Easy Virtue

So, the cool thing about reviewing movies is that you don’t actually have to like the movie… you just have to get through it in order to write about it.  That pretty much sums up how I feel after watching Easy Virtue. My first thoughts after the movie ended were, “……………” followed by, “…….??…..” and then by, “?…..”.

Ben Barnes plays John, a British playboy who falls for and marries Larita (Jessica Biel), a glamorous race-car-driver-slash-feminist from Detroit.  The two have quite a time trying to win over John’s family when they go home to England to visit. John’s mother and father have a blatant difference of opinion of their new daughter-in-law, his mother (Kristen Scott Thomas) absolutely repulsed and his father (Colin Firth) rather intrigued.  It’s a battle of wits between Larita and Mrs. Whittaker and a battle for privacy between the newlyweds and the rest of the family.  Larita attempts to get her stuffy mother-in-law to loosen up, but it only serves to raise Mrs. Whittaker’s annoyance with her son’s choice of a wife even higher.  In the end, the only friend Larita has is her father-in-law and they ride off together in her shiny 1920′s BMW.  By this point in the movie you’ll probably be thinking, “WHAT??? I can’t believe I stayed awake for this.” Ditto, kiddo.

Let’s be honest.  Jessica Biel’s acting didn’t get much better after 7th Heaven.  Sure, she can play the basketball-toting teenage tomboy to a T, but when it comes to playing the leading blonde bombshell on the big screen?  Eh.   Her character rivaled Kristin Scott Thomas’ character quite well – in fact, I dare say they had a bit of chemistry.  Even so, the dialogue of the time period was so proper that it took the sting out of almost every insult that spewed out of anyone’s mouth.  Too bad, some of them might have been funny.

There were a few select moments that brought a smile to my face.  For the sake of getting any enjoyment whatsoever out of this film, I won’t spoil them for you – but know that they are few and far between.  One star for those moments (they kept me awake), one for the verbal daggers exchanged between mother and daughter-in-law, and a half for the butler getting drunk because he’s so bored at one of Mrs. Whittaker’s stuffy parties.  I actually felt sorry for him.  

If you can’t find anything else to pick up at Blockbuster or put in your Netflix queue, view at your own risk of wasting your time.  You can’t say I didn’t warn you.