The Christmas Spirit has inspired me, so I would like to talk to all of you about Rare Exports: A Christmas Tale.
There is nothing like the Finnish tale of Santa Claus to implant fear and strike a genuine sense of terror into the minds of children everywhere. Really, if you decide to watch this movie with your child, don’t be surprised when one of two things happen:
- They run away with such a sense of urgency after seeing the mall Santa Claus that the only way you have of tracking them down is by following a trail of tiny, urine-soaked footprints.
- They ask you what that thing was dangling down from the bearded wonder’s midsection. That’s right—full frontal.
In fact, if you’ve got a kid that still believes in the big guy in red, skip this movie altogether. After watching it, you will have one hell of a hard time convincing them that Santa is absolutely not real.
So, deep in the depths of the Korvatunturi Mountains, an archaeological mining team accidentally unearths the tomb of none other than Santa Claus. After the tomb is discovered, along with a field of slain reindeer, the young children of the town start to disappear. It turns out that the magical being in the sacred grave is, in fact, very much alive, and his army of naked, bearded elves is snatching all of the naughty kids to receive their Yule time punishment.
A young boy and his father set a trap and end up catching one of the elves, who I thought was Santa. This elf is particularly fearsome, stoic, and unclothed, yet impressive in such a cold atmosphere.
This movie is quite entertaining, but it is definitely not your average Christmas movie. It is essentially a horror film cloaked in dark humor and Finnish dialect. While it does move a bit slowly, there is still enough tension and mystery to see it through to the end. Plus, it was nice to see someone stray from the regular story of Santa Claus.
