“I want to look him in the eye and tell him what a cheap, lying, no good, rotten, four flushing, low life, snake lickin’, dirt eatin’, in-bred, overstuffed, ignorant, pus-oozing, blood sucking, dog kissing, brainless, dickless, heartless, hopeless, fat ass, bug eyed, stiff legged, spotty lipped, worm headed sack of monkey shit he is!

Hallelujah! Holy shit! Where’s the Tylenol?”

This is by far one of my favorite monologues in a movie. Is it not? It’s brilliant.

National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation is one of my favorite movies and has been for a long time. I even had a test on it in High School. That just shows how awesome the movie is. Oh and yeah, I got a perfect score on my test too!

Clark (Chevy Chase) and Ellen (Beverly D’Angelo) Griswold want to spread the holiday cheer and have the best family Christmas ever. The Griswold’s invite their dysfunctional extended family and it just causes problem after problem. Clark tries his best to accommodate them but it just doesn’t work. Just when he thought everything was fine, cousin Eddy (Randy Quaid) and his family had to show up uninvited. Cousin Eddy is the type of cousin you try to avoid but at the same time you have to be nice to them because you feel sorry for them. Cousin Eddy just adds to the quirkiness of the movie and makes it much more enjoyable.

The Griswold’s family Christmas goes through many mishaps but Clark still wants have the best Christmas ever. The Griswold’s house becomes the place for all hell to break loose and it sure does. Almost every family member causes some kind of problem that Clark has to deal with. This is one of the funniest movies you will ever see with the best “one liners’ I’ve heard in a long time.

Clark has a big secret Christmas present for the family but it has to wait until he gets his big bonus check from his company. He eventually tells the family that he had put a down payment on a pool and will pay for the rest with his Christmas bonus. When the Christmas bonus check arrives late on Christmas Eve, Clark’s eyes light up with a great big smile. The family crowds around to see Clark’s joyful reaction, but instead they are blessed with something even better… A one year membership in the Jelly of the Month Club! The gift that keeps on giving the whole year. Clark takes this as a big slap in the face and can’t believe that this is his bonus. He becomes very angry and psychotic and eventually goes off on one of the biggest rants I’ve ever had the privilege of hearing. It’s just that good.

I don’t want to do a play by play of the movie because there are far too many great scenes I would like to talk about. Everybody should see this movie and own it because it’s one of the best Christmas movies out there. The other Vacation movies are just as good and Chevy Chase is flawless in them.

My favorite line:

Neighbor – “Hey Griswold, where do you think you’re gonna put a tree that big?”

Clark – “Bend over and I’ll show ya.”

This is a must see movie and you should definitely watch it on December 12 so you’re participating in our Christmas Movie Marathon.